EXTERNAL DRIVE

“Ayoko talaga sa pedia.” “Wag talaga sa Ward 9. Wag sa Ward 11, Lord please...wag din OB” “Ward 3 or 5 pleaaaaase~” These were the words I declared, I thought and I hoped for before and even during the ward assignment for our N121.1 – Intensive Nursing Experience (Hospital-based). SANA HINDI WARD 11. January 21, 2013, Monday: We were asked to choose our top 3 preferred ward assignments and briefly state why we chose that ward since the professors would consider our preferences for our ward assignments.  I chose Ward 5 (Neuro), Ward 6 (Neuro-Surgical) and Ward 3 (Medical). Ward 5 has been the ward I’m wishing for since I was in my third year in college. I enjoyed my first (and last, so far) experience there and I wanted to enjoy more there. Ward 6 was my second choice just because it had “neuro” in its name (yeah, lame). Finally, I chose Ward 3 because I also enjoyed my rotations there and I like the variation of cases there.   Pro...

As part of our degree program curriculum, students are sent to partner communities to promote community development. In our case, we’re sent to San Juan, Batangas. We have been staying there since November 2012 but we go back to Manila every two weekends. We are immersed there until the third week of January 2013. In our community stay, we are expected to mobilize the community in terms of planning, implementing and evaluating health programs. We are also entailed to provide nursing care to five families following the criteria given to us. Aside from these, we are doing our community-based research as well. Months before our community experience, I had been wishing to be assigned to a large barangay where I would be very much challenged without the person I least wanted to work with (let’s call her Arsi). I got what I wanted; I was put in a large barangay, a very challenging one based on the previous batch’s experiences, but unfortunately, I was grouped with that person I least w...

Last night (until about 2am) I was with these "unexpected new friends" in an unexpected dinner in an unexpected place which happened to be the house of one of these unexpected new friends. How did I end up hanging out with them late at night? Spontaneity, it kills me everytime but I enjoy it. By the way, there were four of us.  To begin with, we have been classmates since first year college but we never had the chance to be close friends. Maybe I have been in casual talks and some kind of bonding with them but we never had the opportunity to know each other deeper. We had our different cliques that seemed impenetrable if one was left alone with a barkada to which he/she did not belong. That was the case until this year.  Due to unlikely circumstances, I have been attached to these people even if they did not belong to my barkada and I did not belong in theirs. It started with small chats, jokes and then eating with them until hanging out. We became open to each othe...

When one door closes, another opens. True. You’ve come into my life fast. I welcomed you easily and hoped that “it” will be consistent. Well, I guess I made the wrong move. I should have trusted my instinct. From the start, I felt something was wrong. Everything was fast but I told myself that life is full of surprises. You were one of those surprises, yes, but I thought you were one of the good ones. I thought wrong. Maybe I overanalyzed everything and I hoped for so much. I hoped that you liked me. I hoped that you found me interesting. I hoped that you wanted to know me more. I hoped that you enjoyed the times that we’re together. For some reason I hoped for these but deep in me, I know that I should not. You have no reason to be attached with me. Yes, you have none. I don’t have to enumerate my imperfections because in the past, almost everyday, I thought of them. I am exhausted frustrating myself for so long. TORTURE I think I learned how to deal with th...

I feel nothing right now but confusion and uncertainty. I have been living by the mantra, “When you want it, work on it” and I have been trying to be a living proof of that mantra as much as possible. In fact, the past three and a half years has been a journey full of that mantra – not until this day came. When I was in elementary, I dreamt of being a teacher and almost everyday of my life at that age, I tried to be closer to my dream. I even tried to be an instant teacher. I wrote on the walls of my room, called my sisters for my lecture, used a stick to point at the board, gave quizzes and dismissed my class. As I got older, I suddenly wanted to be a doctor. I do not know how it came to my mind. I just blurted out that one day, I will become one until high school came. During high school, I then wanted to be a lawyer – again, for no certain reason. All I knew was that I liked to be one. Then, alas! Fate led me to pursue a health-related degree and not a long time from n...

They say MOTHERS KNOW BEST. I have to disagree with this sometimes but one thing is certain for me – MOTHERS CARE BEST . After about more than a month, my mother arrived here from the province. She brought not only REAL FOOD but also a bunch of stories from home and a lot of questions as well. Like we always do, we talked over lunch and dinner. We shared stories and yes, it’s as if we do not talk over the phone because we really rarely do. I’m not a fan of having to elaborate stories over the phone or through messaging. It’s just that it’s hard to describe things when your facial expressions and gestures are not seen by who you’re talking to. Anyway, it was indeed a juicy talk. We discussed some serious matters like academics and my sister’s adjustment here in the city but we discussed more not-so-serious things like the Maroon 5 concert,  the UAAP Cheerdance Competition, the last Nursecissism, and others. That was the story part. The question part? Well, she just ask...

I find it hard to work when I’m at the peak of my emotions. That is why I allotted time to publish this entry and release how happy I am right now. One of the best things I learned in college is teamwork. I admit, in high school and even in my earlier years in college, I felt that I was most efficient working alone. I preferred doing things my way in my time. I did not want control and I did not care about how others will do what. However, college life exposed me enough to reality: No man is an island. In our college, we are trained to work as and with a team. I did not like having to deal with different personalities but certain people from my batch taught me how to be a team player. I experienced how they treat each one of us as equals. They showed that no contribution is considered less than another. They considered every effort from the batch significant. They did their part for the batch. They gave their all. They did this even in our earlier years unlike me, w...